You want me to come and lick you but you don't even semd me nudes
[Which makes sense in his mind because he'd been thinking about how thry haven't even met in person yet. He only knows him from old video posts. That just got lost between his brain and his fingers. ]
[ It takes Cassian some fumbling to switch his own phone to video mode. Kay will be treated to the sight of him with his uniform rumpled and open at the collar, his eyes glassy from alcohol. ]
Heeey. This is nicer! No more fiddly buttons!
[ He grins, all proud of his discovery. Slurred speech, too. Someone's really on his best way to thoroughly smashed. ]
[ He scoffs, completely over the top in his melodrama. ]
I know what KX look like! I'm... I'm ISB! I have the blueprints! With all the... the... [ Cassian wriggles his fingers... and then goes off-track for a minute there while he looks in fascination at his fingers. Moving. Wow. ] All the tiny stuff.
I wanna see you.
[ Not that he has any idea what he expects to see of a droid. Just that he hopes to see something which would explain why his other self had gone and chosen to live his life with a very advanced security gadget. Because it's easier to think there's some secret appeal to his frame than to admit to himself that he has simply fallen in love. ]
[Now, that catches his interest. If this version of Cassian has the knowledge about Kay's model, that would be helpful if he ever gets damage.] Do you have them memorizes? What my systems can do?
You need to come to my house for that, I'm not going to the bar.
[Kay is only agreeing to this to stop Cassian from leaving with a stranger woman in his drunken stupor.]
[ After Dorothy has physically hauled him out of the Hangar Queen, she would have done well to sit on him. Or at least not trust him to show common sense. But who could guess that a drunken Cassian who can't find his own nose can find his way to Attleton, to a house he has never been to.
It's a gift he shares with his rebel counterpart - just barely functional enough while drunk to get himself into even bigger trouble.
So now he's stumbling across the yard, throwing snowballs at the windows and hollering his little heart out bellowing Kay's name.
Well, that is, he is making a nuisance of himself right until he activates one of the motion sensor-activated traps in the yard, and ends up face-down in the snow, momentarily immobilized by a stun gun. ]
[Kay doesn't sleep, therefore it isn’t as if he didn’t hear Cassian causing a ruckus to get his attention. He just decided to ignore it. That’s it, until he hears the zapping. It's very tempting to just leave the man outside to freeze, in pain, for being a moron. But he's still Cassian and Kay can't bring himself to do it.
However, he's also in no rush to free him and just walks outside to give him a very judgy stare.]
[ His legs are still useless, the last zap had hit him right in the spine, but he can move enough to turn his head and glare at Kay, and weakly throw some snow in Kay's general direction. ]
Shut up. I'm here. You wanted me here.
[ And now he can't help feeling a little bit hurt by the underwhelming reception. It's irrational, he knows that, but everything is messed up tonight. ]
[Kay being so tall and Cassian being at ground level means that the snow hits him mid-thigh at the highest. It was pretty pathetic but also sorta funny.]
Did your lady dump you? is that why you came? [So he might be a bit not!jealous.]
[ Well, that's all nice and good, but he's still face down in the snow. Cassian scowls and struggles to force his limpid body into an upright position. The wet and cold has seeped into his uniform by now, and he's shivering. ]
She's mean. But she took me home. But she wouldn't bring me to you! I told you I have to lick you. [ He huffs. ] She said no.
[Ugh. Okay, that looks pitiful. Kay is going to regret this, he just knows it, but instincts are stronger than his common sense. He kneels down and effortlessly lips up Cassian, bridal style.]
How is that even when you are not you, you still do the same annoying things? why that obsession with licking me?
Cassian gives him a wide-eyed look, or as wide-eyed as he can in his current state. ]
You're comfy.
[ More comfy than the ground, anyway. Just as an experiment, he decides to cuddle against Kay's chest. And that puts metal right in front of his face. Lots of metal. Of whose lickability he has just been reminded by Kay. ]
And I'm not obsessed. I'm scientific.
[ And scientific spy that he is, he leans forward and licks Kay's shoulder...
...and tries to pull back from the icy-cold metal... tries being the important word. ]
[ Nope, not getting unstuck. Just getting himself more thoroughly stuck, it feels like, and even in his state of drunkenness he has too much common sense to yank hard, and risk hurting himself.
So all he can do is make angry noises and bang his fists - and one foot - against Kay's chest.
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[If only Kay knew that they're talking about Dorothy. He would feel much more relieved.]
NO!
Sure, you only had that.
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You want me to come and lick you but you don't even semd me nudes
[Which makes sense in his mind because he'd been thinking about how thry haven't even met in person yet. He only knows him from old video posts. That just got lost between his brain and his fingers. ]
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I don't...WHAT? [asdkjhkda not even normal Cassian ever asked for that. Why is Kay burdened with this? What god did he anger?]
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Nudes
we never met
i just want to know how lickable you are
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I never wear clothes so I am technically always naked.
[But he will indulge imperial Cassian and turn his replies to video.]
You are a very weird man now.
---> video
Heeey. This is nicer! No more fiddly buttons!
[ He grins, all proud of his discovery. Slurred speech, too. Someone's really on his best way to thoroughly smashed. ]
Whassit about? You want to show me the goods?
...I dun know what goods droids have.
video
You look terrible....but happy, I guess.
[Kay is sure that with the amount of alcohol in Cassian's blood, if he were to be set on fire his body would burn for 4 days straight.]
No! You wanted to see how I looked like, so there, wish granted. I'm not putting up a show for you.
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I know what KX look like! I'm... I'm ISB! I have the blueprints! With all the... the... [ Cassian wriggles his fingers... and then goes off-track for a minute there while he looks in fascination at his fingers. Moving. Wow. ] All the tiny stuff.
I wanna see you.
[ Not that he has any idea what he expects to see of a droid. Just that he hopes to see something which would explain why his other self had gone and chosen to live his life with a very advanced security gadget. Because it's easier to think there's some secret appeal to his frame than to admit to himself that he has simply fallen in love. ]
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[Now, that catches his interest. If this version of Cassian has the knowledge about Kay's model, that would be helpful if he ever gets damage.] Do you have them memorizes? What my systems can do?
You need to come to my house for that, I'm not going to the bar.
[Kay is only agreeing to this to stop Cassian from leaving with a stranger woman in his drunken stupor.]
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[ He sounds far too happy about that for his own good, and nods eagerly. ]
After I've gone home with the lady.
[ Sorry, Kay, he's still stuck on that. ]
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FINE! Do whatever you want.
[And he's going to stop replying your text form now >:(]
nighttime, action
It's a gift he shares with his rebel counterpart - just barely functional enough while drunk to get himself into even bigger trouble.
So now he's stumbling across the yard, throwing snowballs at the windows and hollering his little heart out bellowing Kay's name.
Well, that is, he is making a nuisance of himself right until he activates one of the motion sensor-activated traps in the yard, and ends up face-down in the snow, momentarily immobilized by a stun gun. ]
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However, he's also in no rush to free him and just walks outside to give him a very judgy stare.]
You really came. And what big entrance you did...
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Shut up. I'm here. You wanted me here.
[ And now he can't help feeling a little bit hurt by the underwhelming reception. It's irrational, he knows that, but everything is messed up tonight. ]
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[Kay being so tall and Cassian being at ground level means that the snow hits him mid-thigh at the highest. It was pretty pathetic but also sorta funny.]
Did your lady dump you? is that why you came? [So he might be a bit not!jealous.]
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[ He makes an indignant noise at the back of his throat, and gives Kay a disgruntled look. ]
You've got to tell her I didn't!
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[If she did all that, perhaps that woman isn't as bad as Kay thought.]
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[ He gives Kay an offended look out of large brown eyes - unfocused now from alcohol. ]
She's mean.
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[Wait that doesn't seem right.]
No, she's smart.
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She's mean. But she took me home. But she wouldn't bring me to you! I told you I have to lick you. [ He huffs. ] She said no.
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How is that even when you are not you, you still do the same annoying things? why that obsession with licking me?
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Cassian gives him a wide-eyed look, or as wide-eyed as he can in his current state. ]
You're comfy.
[ More comfy than the ground, anyway. Just as an experiment, he decides to cuddle against Kay's chest. And that puts metal right in front of his face. Lots of metal. Of whose lickability he has just been reminded by Kay. ]
And I'm not obsessed. I'm scientific.
[ And scientific spy that he is, he leans forward and licks Kay's shoulder...
...and tries to pull back from the icy-cold metal... tries being the important word. ]
HrmPF!!!
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[He's 7fot of hard metal, how is that comfy. Go home, Imperial!Cassian, you are drunk.
Wait, this is their home and Kay kicked him out. UHM.]
...
This can't be happening.
[When did his life turns so wrong?]
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[ Nope, not getting unstuck. Just getting himself more thoroughly stuck, it feels like, and even in his state of drunkenness he has too much common sense to yank hard, and risk hurting himself.
So all he can do is make angry noises and bang his fists - and one foot - against Kay's chest.
This. Is. All. The. Droid's. Fault. ]
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The more you move the worse it will be. And stick kicking my shins, karabast!
Ugh, I suppose we will have to move inside and see if we can unstuck you. [Because moving will be so easy now, right?]
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